Sunday, February 12, 2012

"It's easy to take off all your clothes and have sex.
People do it all the time.
But opening up your soul to someone,
Letting them into your spirit, thoughts, fears,
future, hopes, dreams ....
That's being naked .... ♥ ~"

By Rumi


My friend shared this quote on facebook today, and I totally loved it, and agreed with it. 


As we grow older, what used to be so important to us no longer become as important anymore.


I still remember the first time I held a hand of my first boyfriend, first time we kissed, first time we spent the morning together.....


I had a time in my past that I can't be proud of myself for doing so, having different partners just coz I wanted some company. I just wanted someone to love me, and tell me that I worth something, and sex just came along with it. 


But I remember when I got back on my own two feet, and met a boy that I could love again, I remember how special it felt, how happy it made me feel, just having that one kiss, and be held in his arms. The back boning moments, and heart off in the stars flying everywhere. Special feeling like that does not come by with having a sex with a person you only know so little about. 


Kissing a person is not that hard, and having sex with someone is not that hard either. But showing who you are, to the people you are 100% comfortable with, can be a rare opportunity. But if you are one of those fortunate people that does have a friend or a partner you could share yourself and be as naked as yourself like that, then keep it. They worth more than anything in your life. 


Some that you truly care about, are the people that you want to share not only the happy moments but sad moments too. People that will cry with you coz you are sad, people that will smile for you just coz you are happy. I don't believe anyone can live by themselves, like is too beautiful to waste like that.


Now the other day, a friend of mine, Bryan posted this on his blog


"Have you ever risked something important to yourself for something that was unimportant to yourself? How did it turn out? Did you enjoy the experience? And if you have never done it, would you ever do it?"


I love having conversations like this with my friends. It's a type of conversations I have with some of my very close friends on a random occasion at any of the day, especially with a cup of hot drink on sunny warm day (so typical of dunedin, hot drinks are always an essential even on a nice day!). 


Now I had to think about this for a while, and I think it's all about what you consider important in this world, like for instance, if importance is dependent on what is required in your life in order for myself to live, then things like dancing, which I love to bottom of my life, can still be unimportant. I think I can stop dancing any day if I wanted to, but I just choose not to coz I like dancing. And my friends will always mean a lot to me, but I'm not going to deny now that I've used dancing as an excuse and ditched a few events before.


My life in NZ was perfect, with friends I loved, in a country that I loved, that is definitely something that is important to my life. But then I left all that behind to go to Singapore, to have a "stable job". It may be important, but then looking back now, having a "good" job is nothing as important as having a happy lifestyle. In that case, is it considered that I made a risk of something important for something not important? But then coming back to Japan now this time around is incredibly much easier than when I came here 2 years ago. I'm more confident with moving myself around, and talking to people. I was even lost to shop around last time, and got lost if I had wanted to try anything at the shop or ask a question, and I'm def more comfortable using Japanese. So at the end of the day, the life in Singapore is an important experience that was necessarily for me to go through despite how crap the time over there was.


And then there is also an occasion, when once again in my rather shame-less year, I risked my friendship over a night of comfort. I deliberately kept away from my friends and told about it to none so they won't let go of me, but at the end of the day, I knew I was doing something I can never tell my parents about,  and will not be too happy to tell my friends either. Yet I still keep on doing it just for the little selfishness of keeping myself a bit happy.


So the question of which Bryan had asked, is all dependent on how you look at thing, my personal opinion is that there is nothing in this time that is "unimportant". It's just that some things are little more meaningful to you than another. What we should be more considerate is what is most important to us and keep that to our hearts, give us daily reminders about how fortunate we are to have something that means so much to us.


Be it friends, families, partners, pets, or little memories.


Nothing in this life is meaningless, everyday should be lived to maximize the opportunities that was given to us. 

Saturday, February 4, 2012

On The Jet Plane, A Far Far Away.....


So so, I’ve finally made my escape.  Out of the country that I wanted to leave since the day 1 of being on that country. I guess that’s not TOO true. I was excited once, about being in Singapore, but only for 1 week, and not much longer.

Last 2 weeks in Singapore has been the best time I’ve had over my whole time over there. I had amazing friends that I wanted to hang around with, and pushing everything I needed to do aside so I can! Late night dinners, chats, sheesha, any excuse to keep on hanging around really. It kind of felt like I was back in NZ again, driving around on a car, having dinner at friend’s, just watching a movie or playing games at friend’s are some of the things that was not possible at all other non-local friend’s place. Ah the joy of “no visitors allowed” owners.

I was wondering what it would be like to come back to Japan again. After being in Singapore, I def got used to the city life, whether I like it or not.  And now being in Japan once again, it doesn’t feel any different to being in Singapore. Actually, Singapore might be better in a way that it was safer to walk around and no parents to stop me from taking risks.

Oh do I miss the dancing til 2am and the late night suppers already. I’ve been looking up dancing venues to go to when I can get the opportunity to go to, and it looks like I got 2 choices at the moment

1) No dancing at all
2) Take 2 hours trip per way to go out just for a dance.

Well, 2 hours seems like it’ll worth it at the moment. Considering the fact that my parents will NEVER let me go to the one that I could reach in less than an hour. Damn it.

I already miss the WCS every night. I can’t even dance in the house at the moment oz of how bloody cold it is. I’m struggling to even WALK in the house. And you think Singapore doesn’t have enough land space for houses, but JAPAN? Oh man, the size of the houses over here!!!! I honestly wonder how in the hell the family of 4 can live here permanently. Therefore, dancing space is becoming rather hard to gather. I miss the feeling of the dance floor, the full length mirrors, EVERYTHIGN about dancing. And this is only day 3 in Japan.

Good golly, how am I going to live for the next 4 months?